


Stallion, Schmallion

by magicasen



Category: Avengers Assemble (Cartoon)
Genre: Coda, Episode Tag, Established Relationship, Fluff, Horses, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-17
Updated: 2017-06-17
Packaged: 2018-11-15 05:09:47
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,251
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11223981
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/magicasen/pseuds/magicasen
Summary: “JARVIS?”"Yes, sir?”“Did my boyfriend just ditch me for a horse?”Coda to S02E11: 'Downgraded', specificallythis scene!





	Stallion, Schmallion

**Author's Note:**

> Avengers Assemble S4 airs today! This is my contribution to the countdown! 
> 
> I love the idea of Steve being adorable with animals.
> 
> Also, I know nothing about horses. I apologize.

Tony stopped in his tracks, and contemplated walking back out.

“What is that thing doing in here?”

“Snowball's not a thing,” Steve said primly, running the brush across the horse's coat. “He's a proud member of the NYPD Mounted Unit, and has served them for the past five years.”

“And,” Tony circled around, confirming that yes, the horse was in the middle of the living room still, “is there a reason Snowball cannot continue serving the NYPD's pony police at their department?”

“The Shadow Nixes' attack left their headquarters unsafe for the horses,” Steve said. Well, really, the attack of the Asgardian power-guzzling creatures had put the whole city at risk, without any electricity.

“The rest of them are being transported to emergency stables outside of the city,” Steve continued. “But they wanted to see if there were any options to keep any horses in the city. Good for morale, and tourism.”

“So, you volunteered?”

“They said I can patrol around for the next few days by myself!” Steve grinned, and yes, Tony could see that doing wonders for the city's bottom line.

“That's... great, but uh. Where are you going to keep it? We're not exactly equipped to house a horse. Wait, how did you even get it up here?”

“Thor, and Thor's room,” Steve said. “There's a stable in there, apparently, and room to ride.”

Tony couldn't even be surprised. “Well, whatever. Just make sure to control it. I don't accidentally walk into a room behind Snowball and get kicked and die.” He turned. “I'll be in my lab.”

“Oh, c'mon, Tony, don't be like that.” Steve held out his hand. “I have some sugar cubes, try to make friends with him. I'm sure he'll like you.”

Unfortunately, Tony was unable to resist Steve's smile when he was being earnest. He walked over next to Steve, and looked right into the creature's big, beady eyes.

Steve handed him a sugar cube, and Tony cleared his throat, feeling ridiculous as he held his hand up. “Eat up, big guy.”

Snowball leaned over, almost chomping down on his fingers, and only Tony's sense of self-preservation prevented him from snatching his hand away from those gigantic teeth. Snowball raised his head, staring straight at Tony, and Tony wondered if staring back could be perceived as a challenge.

“Great!” Steve praised, and Tony wasn't sure whether he was talking to him or the horse. Steve offered Snowball his own sugar cube, and Snowball actually licked it up, no sign of teeth. Then the horse sniffed at Steve's hand, nudging his hand, then his shoulder when Steve didn't give anything up.

“No, boy, I'm all out. We should get you some real food, though, let's go.” Steve cooed at his new best friend as he led him out. Snowball whinnied in response, as they left Tony alone in the room, blinking after them.

“JARVIS?”

“Yes, sir?”

“Did my boyfriend just ditch me for a horse?”

“I believe there's a TV program with a similar premise. 'It's Me or the Dog.'”

“Right. TiVo that for me.”

* * *

And that was how things went. On the first night, Snowball was nervous about his temporary housing, so Steve had stayed with him, until the horse had finally laid down and got some sleep. Tony had ran his hand through Steve's hair the next morning in greeting, and came away with a fistful of hay.

Then Steve patrolled the city with his new companion, and caused a sensation. Tony had seen, because the news reporters had found him and Snowball, being followed by what felt like a city block of children and their caretakers. When they'd interviewed Steve, he had nothing but praises for the mounted unit division and how much good they did for the city, and of course, taking the time to put a plug in for various state horse rescues. Websites went down from the traffic, and donations to the organizations reached record levels.

“They asked if I wanted to go on a patrol every Saturday!” Steve told him, as Tony looked over the wall to watch him clean Snowball's hooves.

“That's great, Steve.”

Steve stood up, patting Snowball on his side.

“Are you sure you don't want to try riding him? He's a very calm horse, they wouldn't let him on the city streets otherwise.”

“I'm good, thanks.”

Steve looked a bit disappointed, and he better not keep that up or else Tony really would give in. “Bad experiences?”

“Not really. Mom had some interest, signed me up for equestrian classes when I was a kid. I was in the middle of my Arthurian phase, so of course I was all aboard.”

Steve raised an eyebrow. “Are you saying that phase is over?”

Tony ignored him. “Dad had no interest, of course. So then I got into cars, even though I couldn't drive then.”

“Right,” Steve said. He walked to Tony, leaning over the stall door, and brought Tony in for a kiss.

“What was that for?” Tony mumbled, when Steve let go.

“I felt like it,” Steve smiled.

“Oh, I'll show _you_ what I feel like doing,” Tony grumbled, pulling Steve back in. 

Steve began laughing halfway through, and Tony doubled his efforts to stop him, but Steve quickly broke the kiss, wheezing. 

“That tickles, boy!” Steve laughed, rubbing Snowball's neck as he kept getting nuzzled. “Okay, okay, here, you get one too,” he said, and he leaned in and kissed the side of the horse's face. 

Snowball raised its head to stare at Tony, and fine, if it was going to be like that, Tony was just going to stare right on back. 

* * *

Steve was carefully cleaning up his grooming kit, looking forlornly at each brush and set of clippers before he set them away.

“You'll see him on Saturday,” Tony offered, feeling slightly guilty he was relieved Snowball had gone back to his trainer and home. Just slightly.

To be fair, Snowball had seemed pleased, too, in whatever counted for happy in horse language, although he'd given Steve quite a number of nuzzles before being led off. He'd even snorted in Tony's direction until he was given a sugar cube, which counted as love.

“Yeah,” Steve said, and no, they were not going to have the dog, cat, turtle, or goldfish discussion again. “Well, I guess it's for the better. You not being a horse fan and all.”

“I don't _dislike_ them,” Tony said. “I just prefer putting my life in the hands of something I know I can trust.” Like, say, the armor, or really, just the repulsor boots themselves were fine—

Tony wouldn't admit how loudly he yelped when the world went sideways. Steve grinned down at him, proud of ambushing his team leader with a sneak bridal carry.

“You mean, like this?” Steve asked.

Tony was dipped down even further, blood rushing to his head, barely a foot from the ground, but he couldn't find it in himself to care when Steve had finally decided it was time to kiss him.

“You're so embarrassing,” Tony mumbled when Steve righted him.

Steve just smiled. So, Tony had to make it as difficult as possible to carry him, wriggling and being distracting with his mouth and hands and making it generally difficult to hold onto. He knew Steve would never drop him.

“So, are you going to ride me, tonight?” Steve whispered, and Tony rolled his eyes and brought him in for a kiss as he was carried into their bedroom.

 


End file.
